Of Life’s Uncertainties

I don’t know how to start this entry in this four year old blog. For the first time after four years I was able to open this account without even remembering its existence throughout the year. I decided to write another entry today because my mind and my heart felt so heavy today. For the past months. Since quarantine began. Since Covid changed everyone’s lives.

You see, last year, I took risk and made the biggest decision in my life. I decided to quit my full time office job in a known company in my city. I quit my job and flew to the county’s capital city to follow my heart. Few years ago I met a man. A foreigner man. Long story short I fell in love with him and decided to spend the rest of my life with him. But being with him requires me to leave the life I was starting to establish. A life I have planned for me and my family. I was certain enough I wanted that life.

Life suddenly became a bitch after I left everything at home with $300 on my bank account. My visa was not granted. Which meant I won’t be able to be with the man I love most. Which meant I just took the biggest risk of my life and lost. Which meant that I have nowhere to go now. My partner was miles away and I was alone in that city.

I decided to go home. At least I have my parent’s house, at least they will surely feed me. But months of hibernating inside the room I decided to take a risk again and get all the certificates needed just for me to enter his country.

Just when I thought I finally have direction, just when I was having a routine again, just when I was gaining my sanity again, Covid decided to mess up with me. Now everything is uncertain. I cannot pursue in applying another visa, I cannot enter his country, I cannot get the certificates needed, and when I look for jobs, the market is super competitive and for someone who had been unemployed for a year, I am surely the last option of every employer.

I am having episodes again. Episodes of crying not knowing what’s the reason. Episodes of self doubt. Episodes of anxieties. Episodes of thinking I just wasted my life.

I don’t know how to end this just like how I didn’t know how to start this.

Four Ways to Relax for a Short while

(c) ihomeremedy.net

Each one of us is busy with our own lives. Everyday is a survival to continue living in this world. We are busy with our works. We are busy with school. We are busy with our family and friends. As a matter of fact, life on Earth is already predetermined. We wake up, we go to work or school, spend most of our time there, we eat, and we go home very tired. With this everyday process, it’s hard for us to find time to relax. To breath out. To get away from our busy schedules. Sometimes, sleep is not enough for us to gain again our motivation in surviving this world. But I know some techniques of relaxation which only require short period of time . I’ll bring you fours ways of relaxation which I learned from my Learning Theories class last semester.

Before doing any of these techniques. It is very important to clear your mind from any thoughts while you are closing your eyes. Imagine that your are the only person in the surrounding.

1. Shavasana Technique

This relaxation is usually used for cancer patients. In this relaxation technique, close your eyes, and then breath in. Count 1 to 7 slowly and then breath out. Continue doing this process until you’re already relax and ready to get back to whatever you’re doing.

2. Benson Technique

This is the simplest way of relaxation. In this technique, first close your eyes, breath in, and then breath out. While breathing out, say the word “one” or any one syllable word you’re comfortable to use. Continue doing this process until you feel relax.

3. Autogenics Training

This one is my favorite form of relaxation. In this process, close your eyes. Imagine a beautiful place you want to visit. Imagine a stress-free place. It could be in line with nature wherein you imagine yourself in a paradise with green surroundings. You’re enjoying the sound of birds singing and the music of falling water. It could also a place where you’re comfortable to stays or you’re comfort zone. It could be anything you want as long as you feel relax while exploring your imagination in that place. This is also a form of self hypnosis.

4. Jacobson Technique

This technique involves your muscles. When your eyes hurt from reading all your required articles to read, close your eyes with a little pressure, hold them for a while and then let go. When your hands hurt from writing, just gently clench your hands, hold for a while, and let go. You can do this with other parts of your body.

It is important to know that the effectivity of these techniques still lies on you. Clear your mind from any stressful thoughts before doing any of these techniques. Always remember that mind is always superior with the body. If you keep on ruminating all your problems, your body will be in pain which leads to stress. Our body is can only do limited things. After all we are all humans, we get tired. No matter how much we strive hard, if we don’t take good care of our body all our efforts will be put in vain. Sometimes, it is really important to find time to breath out.